Zero Sum?

Build your relationships first….then your dentistry. ~ Bob Barkley

Zero Sum?

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Perspective is everything, particularly when it comes to working with others. Bring our biases and personal agendas into a relationship with a new patient, and the very nature of the relationship changes. Remain open-minded, and focused on THEIR agendas, THEIR biases and THEIR predilections, and we learn new things about them, our perspective shifts, OUR behavior changes, and consequently the direction of the relationship changes over time.

There is confusion in the minds of many with regard to the meaning of a “patient-centered” practice, as it does not mean the patient is always right, or that we do whatever they want in an attempt to get them to like us and continue to engage our business.

That’s pandering.

That’s manipulative, in a passive way.

That’s acting politically -thinking and speaking in ways which advance our agenda without regard for how the other person feels.

That’s demonstrating that we do not have a clarified value system, and therefore an overarching health-centered practice purpose.

And that likely means that money is the central and common denominator.

Money and the pursuit of health lie in completely different areas of the mind: One is limiting – the other limitless.

A relationship-based, health-centered practice is about seeing the oak tree in the acorn…its aspirational, expansive, facilitative, developmental, and growth-oriented.

An insurance-centric practice, where a tremendous amount of time, energy, and money is invested in code-mining, and the pursuit of reimbursement – is limiting. It’s not about growth-it’s about sales. And sales and the pursuit of health are two very different things.

So, the insurance-centric practice sees the potential profit in the plans, not the potential in the person. The insurance-centric practice is therefore largely bounded by their biases and perspective… “People tend to do only what their plan will pay for, so let’s make sure everyone maximizes their benefits.”

The person-centered practice says, “Where would you like to go? And, where would you like to be in twenty, thirty years? Have you ever thought about that?”

Developmental mindset vs. a narrow, rigid mindset.

Abundance mindset vs. scarcity mindset.

Zero sum vs. endless possibilities.

These are choices we make which then influence our behavior, and therefore everything else downstream, including our health, our patient’s health, and the health of our practice.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

Its all a big game.

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Game Theory is defined as “the branch of mathematics concerned with the analysis of strategies for dealing with competitive situations where the outcome of a participant’s choice of action depends critically on the actions of other participants. Game theory has been applied to contexts in war, business, and biology.”

Game Theory is also highly relevant in the social sciences, hence on the interpersonal relationship level, and is also highly associated with our neurobiology.

In this context, we can think of every interaction with every person each day as a game…a game where each participant has goals and agendas. The “game” may be a simple as you want a Starbucks’ coffee and the Starbucks’ employee wants an exact amount of money in return. Or, it can be as complex as a patient wanting to feel better about themselves, but they have no idea how to accomplish it – hence, they are sitting across the table from you.

On a neurobiology level, games are mediated primarily by our dopamine “reward system.” When we “win” the substantia nigra and ventral tegmental area areas of our brain manufacture and release dopamine. “Win” several times, and you may develop a habit, or even an addiction.

Studies show that as this reward system matures around a specific action, such as drug addiction, it actually responds BEFORE the event in anticipation of the reward, hence the motivation to keep doing actions which are actually existential threats.

In other ways, this internal reward system is involved in encouraging us to eat or not, run every day- or not, or go to the dentist-or not.

Studies show that if we don’t “win” at least 30% of the time, we will start to “extinguish” the behavior. This means that when patients come to us and do not feel like they are “winning”…getting what they want out of their relationship with us, they will stop showing up, answering the phone, or even paying their bills.

On a personal level, dentists will stop doing comprehensive examinations on their patients when the case acceptance rates drop down to near the 33% mark.

So consider this: You are it, and it is you. Your biology drives your behavior and your behavior drives your biology – sometimes for the better and sometimes for worse.

The take-away here is that we need to become more aware of these truths and manage them in a more organized way which will increase our chances of reaching preferred outcomes…”winning”…and reduce our chance of “losing.”

Fine-tune our new patient processes, and we can create more win-win agreements. Fine-tune our relationships with others, and others -in increasing numbers- will want to continue playing the game with us, and therefore there will be more “winning” for both of us in the future. And do all of that well – over and over again – and we will have a growing practice and quite a prosperous future.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more or Co-discovery.com

When is Tape not “good enough?”

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Seth Godin shared the following on his blog today:

”I’m sitting on a black couch in the lobby of a nice theater. The couch is cracked and peeling, with seven strips of black gaffer’s tape holding it together. And you don’t have to be an interior geologist to see that it has developed this patina over time, bit by bit.

The question is: Who was the first person who decided to fix the couch with tape?

The third or fifth person did a natural thing–here’s a ratty couch, let’s keep it the best we can.

But the first taper?

The first taper decided that it was okay for this theater to have a taped couch. The first taper didn’t make the effort to alert the authorities, to insist on getting the couch repaired properly.

The first taper decided, “this is good enough for now.”

This is how we find ourselves on the road to decay.”
…..

This got me thinking.

Do our patients always know when we are just using dentistry’s version of “tape,” instead of proper restoration? If so, what is the condition of the rest of the “couch”, and do they know it and understand what that means to them long-term?

Or, have we by system or habit allowed ourselves to think “this is good enough for now, I’ll tell them about that later?”

Have we, because of insurance company pressures and our inability to price our time and services appropriately, allowed our standards to “decay”?

And perhaps even worse, are we in a situation where we can’t control the standards, the pricing, and therefore to a large degree – the quality?

Many in corporate dentistry today likely can relate to this last conundrum.

Because it’s all inter-related:

Caring enough not to compromise our standards.

Allowing ourselves enough time to do things right.

Pricing our time and services appropriately so that we can afford to spend the time to do it right – or even over again.

Developing the interpersonal skills and approaches which allow patients to better understand the bigger picture and its implications so they can make better decisions.

And then deciding together whether or not “tape” is a “good enough” decision right now.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

Do you have Cultural Goals?

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Our practices and lives are works-in-process, and we have a choice with regard to how much we want to guide, lead, influence, and propagate that which we create.

Setting values-driven goals, and then focusing on their attainment is the best way to achieve all of the above. Below are five “cultural goals,” which are global in context, and which speak to the nature of your heart, and therefore can help you to transform your practice from just being just a place others visit, into a supportive community for healing, growth, and development of all participants.

  1. AUTHENTICITY: work hard at moving away from manipulating people toward an aim you have in mind for them, and instead lead them through your authentic personal power. Become the person others want to listen to -and follow – by speaking honestly, and non-judgmentally from your heart. This would include knowing when not to say a word…developing the self-disciple to wait for the ‘learning moment.’
  2. SELF-COMPASSION: As dentists, we are often our own worst critics. We see, magnified, every day where we fell short, or where we could have done better. And this happens repeatedly on both technical and interpersonal levels. Learn to accept your current state of imperfection, while remaining aware of how you can do better next time.
  3. GRATITUDE: We have all successfully climbed many mountains. We have all performed at exceptionally high levels through high school, college, and dental school. We can all do things with our hands and minds that very few people can understand, much-the-less do repeatedly at extremely high levels of technical competence day-in and day-out. Learn how to step back and give yourself a pat on the back – even when things aren’t going perfectly. And learn to be grateful for the opportunities you have been given and currently enjoy, as there are many.
  4. LISTEN TO YOURSELF: You have amazing intuitive capacities, most of which lie dormant behind executing day-to-day commitments and rather mindless routines. Learn to listen to that little voice inside which has great wisdom about yourself and how to creatively resolve some of the complex problems you are facing, instead of attempting to do the same things over and over and hoping for some magical change in outcome.
  5. CALMNESS: We live in an extremely over-stimulative culture where we are bombarded moment by moment with more information and situations than we can possibly process and toward which -appropriately respond. This can create an addiction to a lifestyle about which we think we need this overstimulation to feel worth while, when in fact the opposite is true. Living in the moment is where joy and satisfaction reside, and it is not possible to be ‘in the moment’ when our brain is going 100 miles an hour performing mindless tasks or consuming empty information. Learning to live in the moment is a counter-cultural thought, but if you can master it, you will never regret it.
  6. MISSIONAL WORK: Find a way to evolve your dental practice into being about a whole lot more than just teeth and money. Make it about helping people to help themselves. Become a facilitator of understanding, growth, and of increasing self-responsibility. And when you achieve this, you will never regret going to the office on Mondays again.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

What is your culture?

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Culture can be defined as a shared set of patterns of thinking…a set of shared assumptions and propositions that a group of people carry around in their minds. Hence, culture is the lens through which we see and interpret what is happening around us. So, every time we meet a new person in our practice, our practice culture is mediating our experience and influencing our conclusions.

But what if our culture is flawed? What if we inherited a culture- a belief system and set of thought structures- which are outdated, or just plain wrong? What if we never take the time to question our belief system? What if we never assume our culture could be flawed?

Then our brain literally gets lost because it doesn’t have enough reliable guideposts to render out accurate conclusions. And we start to function out of assumptions which can easily become our dogma.

When our dogma becomes our culture, we become stuck and struggle to come up with creative solutions. We assume the game is lost…that others don’t care…that this is the best we can do…that true person-centered dentistry has no future as Smile Direct Club comes into town and offers digital scans for free.

Albert Einstein said, “Most teachers waste their time by asking questions that are intended to discover what a pupil does not know, whereas the true art of questioning is to discover what the pupil does know or is capable of knowing.”

Does your culture honor the truth that most people are the best experts about themselves? Does it leverage their ability to make choices when empowered, which are in their best interest? Or does your practice culture assume that you are the expert, and therefore others need to listen and follow your every direction?

If you want to see patients constantly make better decisions, then you need to help them with that. But it will rarely happen if everything is about you(r) agendas without understanding other people’s agendas first.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

Do you have a marketing problem?

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We have a ‘marketing problem’ when:

“There are people who would benefit from your work who aren’t engaging with you.

There’s a change you seek to make in the culture, but it’s not happening.

You’re having difficulty persuading other people of your point of view.

The service or product you make isn’t resonating with those you seek to serve.

You’re fighting in a race to the bottom, and it’s wearing you out.

If you have a marketing problem, how much time are you spending working on a marketing solution? What are you investing in, learning, creating… Because you can’t solve your marketing problem tomorrow by simply repeating what you did yesterday.”

As you can see, marketing is a global issue, and must therefore be conceptualized in a comprehensive way.

There are only three reasons you are not doing more of the kind of dentistry with the kind of people you want to be doing it with:

  1. You are not very good at delivering on the promise
  2. They don’t know you exist
  3. There aren’t very many of those people close to you and you will need to communicate out to a broader audience

Most dentists naturally focus on #1, and struggle in the shadows with an amazing skill set that few people seem to appreciate.

By balancing your attention on all three of these issues, solutions emerge. But how do you best approach issues 1, 2, and 3?

That depends on what it is that you are trying to achieve. What’s your purpose? And what are the principles which stand behind that purpose? Because the principles are what you need to be promoting and projecting out into the public sphere, not just the flash…not the doctor dancing around the office or bragging about how great they are.

What is it that you can do which means something deeply significant to your target audience? And how can you best convey that information and feeling to them on a consistent-enough basis that they are more likely to act on what they value?

That is what marketing is about. Are you focused enough on it to achieve the outcome you desire?

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

Its All about Meaning

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It is easy to maintain an anxious state of mind with regard to the future, as the constant flow of information inside and outside of our control can easily become overwhelming. This is because our brains are essentially designed for one primary purpose: self-preservation.

And when our situation is chronically confusing, threatening, or contains too many unknowns, our limbic brain predominates and influences our behavior in an unbalanced and often paralyzing fashion.

This natural tendency toward conservatism – a desire to maintain the status quo in spite of it being unsatisfactory- can be overcome by finding a deeply purposeful plan…discovering our ‘why.’

Having a deeply purposeful plan shifts much of our brain functioning from the anxious limbic areas to the thoughtful and productive prefrontal cortex.

And if we establish a clear vision of our preferred future – remain “future focused,” as Bob Barkley used to say, our brain functions ‘as if’ this perspective is true and then goes about looking for ways to assist and advance it. Maxwell Malz, MD wrote a classic book on this phenomenon titled Psycho-Cybernetics.

From the perspective of modern brain science, what we orient ourselves towards consciously and unconsciously …that which captures and holds our attention …is personal meaning. And this happens even before we realize it. The brain acts as if the whole world is made up of information relative to meaning – not just physical material.

The legendary German philosopher Heidegger was convinced this was true as well. He wrote that the world is primarily constructed by each of us through our interpretations of our experiences- personal meanings. This type of thinking today feels foreign, because our culture has largely shifted toward a deeply materialistic secular philosophy.

And a deeply materialistic secular perspective lacks a lot of meaning. But if we look deeper and deeper at anything physical, the shapes can be broken down into smaller and smaller units…cells, atoms…electrons…and eventually just energy behaving in a predictable fashion.

But WHY does this happen? Such answers can only be found in the realm of philosophy and religion.

So, why am I taking you here in this discussion? Because all of this holds true for our patients as well.

Our patient’s need to find their ‘why’ if we want them to make better health-centered decisions when they are with us. They need to understand the meaning (to themselves) of the treatment we are discussing with them. And this represents way more than just a physical phenomenon to them.

This is key because it is only after THEY have found a meaningful purpose behind our proposals that THEIR prefrontal cortex will kick in and to be able to visualize the possibilities; hence, the value of the possibilities from their point of view.

So, our role is not to “sell”, “convince”, or “present,” our role is to lead our patients toward the creation of their own vision, one meaningful experience at a time. And after that has occurred, its almost as if we can’t stop them from proceeding in the right direction, and making better decisions and commitments.

Paul A. Henny DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

What is the nature of your relationships?

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Seth Godin is a brilliant thinker. In a recent blog post he told the following story entitled, “But he paid extra”:

We come up lots of reasons to work with jerks.

We take an investment from a jerk investor instead of a kind one.

We accept a job from a bully instead of someone who will nurture and challenge us with worthwhile work.

And we take on a customer who denigrates our team and our work instead of embracing the good ones…

The most common reason is that they pay us more. A better valuation, a better hourly rate.

That’s not a good enough reason. We pay for it many more times than we get paid for it.

……

Do you often find yourself in similar situations in your practice, except you are being paid LESS than you desire and deserve? You are working with people who are incapable for one reason or another of “paying you a fair fee with gratitude,” as Dr. Pankey used to say?

When we are in situations like this, commonly we are also in the middle of a dysfunctional dependency relationship, where expectations are not clear, communication poor, and assumptions abound – and lots of wrong ones at that.

And when assumptions are proven wrong, particularly when they involve money and low value for what is being paid for, confrontations arise. These may be aggressive, or passive aggressive -in your face or quietly simmering in the background.

When we fail to take charge of the relationships we have with our patients, they always go into some form of default mode based on assumptions. And that is a bad place to be.

But if we take control of a relationship by inviting a person into a collaborative one, one where understandings are more clear, communication channels are open, and responsibilities shared – amazing things happen.

Because two minds are better than one. And two people pulling in the same direction go farther. And two people who accomplish a lot together build lifelong bonds and deep mutual respect.

We should never consciously put ourselves in a situation like the one Seth describes. Nor should we do something even worse, work hard for someone who is resentful, or disrespectful.

Don’t do it. Show some leadership and strategically manage your relationships on a higher and more emotionally intelligent level.

You are the boss. Own it and stop complaining about the behavior of others that you allow to be close. Money isn’t the pathway to happiness, but a lack of it in combination with disrespect is hell – particularly in dentistry.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more on www.codiscovery.com

Can we Stand the truth?

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GM has a problem – and it is not new, because long ago, they forgot something. And in spite of the fact that the public has been screaming at them for four decades not opening up their checkbooks very often – they persisted.

Tone deaf.

Arrogant.

Thinking like they knew what was best.

Trying to force THEIR choices down on others.

There was a time when GM cars captured the imagination. Remember the 1972 Oldsmobile 442? The 1968 Pontiac GTO?

I do.

We in dentistry have the same problem. Most of us think we are selling services, hardware and things that fill spaces. But really what they are selling is a feeling. Feelings like, “I feel good about this decision.” Or, “I am not so sure about this, to I have to pay for it?”

We sell value, but not what we value – what our patients value.

But how can we know what our patient’s value and provide it to them if we don’t know them well?

We can’t.

And that is a fact.

So, think about this. Your future lies in your ability to deliver to others what they want. And if you don’t know what they want, and they don’t know what they want, then they will default to loss aversion: Why should I give you my money…something that I value more than your filling or crown, or your whatever thing I don’t understand?

Why?

That is an important question to answer.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at www.codiscovery.com

Compliance vs. Commitment

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There are two distinctly different ways patients can say “yes” to treatment. Some say “yes” because the dentist has positional authority and is perceived to be the “expert.” In this case, the patient COMPLIES without significantly understanding what is going to happen or why the treatment has been proposed.

On the other hand, others make much more deeply informed choices through facilitated choice-making. These decisions are based upon their values, goals, and vision for themselves going forward. These decisions represent COMMITMENT – commitment to seeing the process through AND to an outcome they significantly value.

Achieving commitment* is an essential step when providing complex restorative, esthetic, and/or expensive treatment. (Commitment is less critical when proposing less expensive primary or emergency treatment).

Problems arise when patients COMPLY but do not fully COMMIT, particularly when some aspect of the treatment process goes off-course…it was more uncomfortable or inconvenient than anticipated…the implant failed to osseointegrate…the crown was never comfortable to chew on…the new fillings were sensitive…the root canaled tooth always felt odd…the front teeth never looked exactly like they thought they would.

These discrepancies potentially create resentment, or a level of disappointment which may or may not be expressed. In some cases, the patient might even leave the practice as a result without ever saying a word. And of course, in the worst case scenario, the patient might pursue legal advice.

Co-discovery, pioneered by Bob Barkley, was designed to help patients to more consistently move toward commitment. And this is important, because complying is not necessarily collaborating, and therefore it does not always involve the patient taking ownership of their problems – a critical boundary issue and key to successfully resolving the inevitable unexpected challenges which can occur along the path of a complex treatment process.

Commitment is different as it IS more collaborative, and therefore when problems or challenges arise, there is an openness within the relationship to discuss, negotiate, and more easily resolve them. It places ownership in the right place ( via a shared – interdependent relationship ). Commitment should always be the goal for every relationship, and being patient and willing to wait for it to emerge via facilitation is the key to success- because compliance without commitment is a dangerous place to be with others.

Paul A Henny, DDS

Read more at www.codiscovery.com

* Commitment requires a psychological process that Jean Piaget PhD called “adaptation” where significant adjustments are made by this person with regard to their perspective and how they approach a problem. With commitments, often times fundamental assumptions have been changed – “paradigm shifts” which are both significant and values-based.

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