Its all a big game.

Build your relationships first….then your dentistry. ~ Bob Barkley

Its all a big game.

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Game Theory is defined as “the branch of mathematics concerned with the analysis of strategies for dealing with competitive situations where the outcome of a participant’s choice of action depends critically on the actions of other participants. Game theory has been applied to contexts in war, business, and biology.”

Game Theory is also highly relevant in the social sciences, hence on the interpersonal relationship level, and is also highly associated with our neurobiology.

In this context, we can think of every interaction with every person each day as a game…a game where each participant has goals and agendas. The “game” may be a simple as you want a Starbucks’ coffee and the Starbucks’ employee wants an exact amount of money in return. Or, it can be as complex as a patient wanting to feel better about themselves, but they have no idea how to accomplish it – hence, they are sitting across the table from you.

On a neurobiology level, games are mediated primarily by our dopamine “reward system.” When we “win” the substantia nigra and ventral tegmental area areas of our brain manufacture and release dopamine. “Win” several times, and you may develop a habit, or even an addiction.

Studies show that as this reward system matures around a specific action, such as drug addiction, it actually responds BEFORE the event in anticipation of the reward, hence the motivation to keep doing actions which are actually existential threats.

In other ways, this internal reward system is involved in encouraging us to eat or not, run every day- or not, or go to the dentist-or not.

Studies show that if we don’t “win” at least 30% of the time, we will start to “extinguish” the behavior. This means that when patients come to us and do not feel like they are “winning”…getting what they want out of their relationship with us, they will stop showing up, answering the phone, or even paying their bills.

On a personal level, dentists will stop doing comprehensive examinations on their patients when the case acceptance rates drop down to near the 33% mark.

So consider this: You are it, and it is you. Your biology drives your behavior and your behavior drives your biology – sometimes for the better and sometimes for worse.

The take-away here is that we need to become more aware of these truths and manage them in a more organized way which will increase our chances of reaching preferred outcomes…”winning”…and reduce our chance of “losing.”

Fine-tune our new patient processes, and we can create more win-win agreements. Fine-tune our relationships with others, and others -in increasing numbers- will want to continue playing the game with us, and therefore there will be more “winning” for both of us in the future. And do all of that well – over and over again – and we will have a growing practice and quite a prosperous future.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more or Co-discovery.com

When is Tape not “good enough?”

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Seth Godin shared the following on his blog today:

”I’m sitting on a black couch in the lobby of a nice theater. The couch is cracked and peeling, with seven strips of black gaffer’s tape holding it together. And you don’t have to be an interior geologist to see that it has developed this patina over time, bit by bit.

The question is: Who was the first person who decided to fix the couch with tape?

The third or fifth person did a natural thing–here’s a ratty couch, let’s keep it the best we can.

But the first taper?

The first taper decided that it was okay for this theater to have a taped couch. The first taper didn’t make the effort to alert the authorities, to insist on getting the couch repaired properly.

The first taper decided, “this is good enough for now.”

This is how we find ourselves on the road to decay.”
…..

This got me thinking.

Do our patients always know when we are just using dentistry’s version of “tape,” instead of proper restoration? If so, what is the condition of the rest of the “couch”, and do they know it and understand what that means to them long-term?

Or, have we by system or habit allowed ourselves to think “this is good enough for now, I’ll tell them about that later?”

Have we, because of insurance company pressures and our inability to price our time and services appropriately, allowed our standards to “decay”?

And perhaps even worse, are we in a situation where we can’t control the standards, the pricing, and therefore to a large degree – the quality?

Many in corporate dentistry today likely can relate to this last conundrum.

Because it’s all inter-related:

Caring enough not to compromise our standards.

Allowing ourselves enough time to do things right.

Pricing our time and services appropriately so that we can afford to spend the time to do it right – or even over again.

Developing the interpersonal skills and approaches which allow patients to better understand the bigger picture and its implications so they can make better decisions.

And then deciding together whether or not “tape” is a “good enough” decision right now.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

Do you have Cultural Goals?

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Our practices and lives are works-in-process, and we have a choice with regard to how much we want to guide, lead, influence, and propagate that which we create.

Setting values-driven goals, and then focusing on their attainment is the best way to achieve all of the above. Below are five “cultural goals,” which are global in context, and which speak to the nature of your heart, and therefore can help you to transform your practice from just being just a place others visit, into a supportive community for healing, growth, and development of all participants.

  1. AUTHENTICITY: work hard at moving away from manipulating people toward an aim you have in mind for them, and instead lead them through your authentic personal power. Become the person others want to listen to -and follow – by speaking honestly, and non-judgmentally from your heart. This would include knowing when not to say a word…developing the self-disciple to wait for the ‘learning moment.’
  2. SELF-COMPASSION: As dentists, we are often our own worst critics. We see, magnified, every day where we fell short, or where we could have done better. And this happens repeatedly on both technical and interpersonal levels. Learn to accept your current state of imperfection, while remaining aware of how you can do better next time.
  3. GRATITUDE: We have all successfully climbed many mountains. We have all performed at exceptionally high levels through high school, college, and dental school. We can all do things with our hands and minds that very few people can understand, much-the-less do repeatedly at extremely high levels of technical competence day-in and day-out. Learn how to step back and give yourself a pat on the back – even when things aren’t going perfectly. And learn to be grateful for the opportunities you have been given and currently enjoy, as there are many.
  4. LISTEN TO YOURSELF: You have amazing intuitive capacities, most of which lie dormant behind executing day-to-day commitments and rather mindless routines. Learn to listen to that little voice inside which has great wisdom about yourself and how to creatively resolve some of the complex problems you are facing, instead of attempting to do the same things over and over and hoping for some magical change in outcome.
  5. CALMNESS: We live in an extremely over-stimulative culture where we are bombarded moment by moment with more information and situations than we can possibly process and toward which -appropriately respond. This can create an addiction to a lifestyle about which we think we need this overstimulation to feel worth while, when in fact the opposite is true. Living in the moment is where joy and satisfaction reside, and it is not possible to be ‘in the moment’ when our brain is going 100 miles an hour performing mindless tasks or consuming empty information. Learning to live in the moment is a counter-cultural thought, but if you can master it, you will never regret it.
  6. MISSIONAL WORK: Find a way to evolve your dental practice into being about a whole lot more than just teeth and money. Make it about helping people to help themselves. Become a facilitator of understanding, growth, and of increasing self-responsibility. And when you achieve this, you will never regret going to the office on Mondays again.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

What is your culture?

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Culture can be defined as a shared set of patterns of thinking…a set of shared assumptions and propositions that a group of people carry around in their minds. Hence, culture is the lens through which we see and interpret what is happening around us. So, every time we meet a new person in our practice, our practice culture is mediating our experience and influencing our conclusions.

But what if our culture is flawed? What if we inherited a culture- a belief system and set of thought structures- which are outdated, or just plain wrong? What if we never take the time to question our belief system? What if we never assume our culture could be flawed?

Then our brain literally gets lost because it doesn’t have enough reliable guideposts to render out accurate conclusions. And we start to function out of assumptions which can easily become our dogma.

When our dogma becomes our culture, we become stuck and struggle to come up with creative solutions. We assume the game is lost…that others don’t care…that this is the best we can do…that true person-centered dentistry has no future as Smile Direct Club comes into town and offers digital scans for free.

Albert Einstein said, “Most teachers waste their time by asking questions that are intended to discover what a pupil does not know, whereas the true art of questioning is to discover what the pupil does know or is capable of knowing.”

Does your culture honor the truth that most people are the best experts about themselves? Does it leverage their ability to make choices when empowered, which are in their best interest? Or does your practice culture assume that you are the expert, and therefore others need to listen and follow your every direction?

If you want to see patients constantly make better decisions, then you need to help them with that. But it will rarely happen if everything is about you(r) agendas without understanding other people’s agendas first.

Paul A. Henny, DDS

Read more at Codiscovery.com

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